46. “God, how long is a million years?”God answers, “To me, it’s about a minute.”“God, how much is a million dollars?”Time is relative, especially to the entity that invented it.You’d have to be nuts to jump into the Seine, which is the river that runs through Paris. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! guys: Guess we'll never know!your early 20s vs your late 20sTelling a woman to get back in the kitchen is a weird insult to lob on Twitter. I mean, like, the most exaggerated thing in the history of ever! for example, "I go harder than a priest next to a choir boy" ... 10 years ago. Because not nowKeep up with the latest daily buzz with the BuzzFeed Daily newsletter! Real women are plump and covered in a creamy sauce wait nope thinkin of pastaCrazy how women have the stereotype of being chatty when 90% of dudes have 45 minute podcasts that no one listens to...MEDIA: "We can't believe Trump would tweet something so awful!!!" Me "Yes" 'Cause men keep misinterpreting what you say to support their own selfish agendas.o yeah u love women??? ‘Bout as useful as a prefabricated post hole. I tried explaining each below, in bold. The time traveler hasn’t arrived at the end yet.Homeopathy holds that a substance, which causes symptoms when taken in large doses, can be used in far smaller doses to treat those same symptoms. Read other I always get this wrong, to (or is that “too” … “Two?”)A: “If I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times …”N is a placeholder for a number. 48. BREATH!! " 47. This particular photon didn’t need a suitcase because it was going to a nudist convention. Running this gag. 50. In fact, anyone caught telling one often ends up in Haydn.Who knew that the opening strands of Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony were an homage to his favorite fruit? We could have used X, but this is a family magazine. Busier than a one-armed paper hanger with jock itch. So when counting down, happily stop at nothing—or zero—to avoid the dreaded negative numbers.The world’s population is split sort of evenly between men and women, making the average human part male, part female, and a complete pain to shop for. I, for one, have always been disappointed by the lack of cupholders on mine.Women who say getting married was the best day of their life have obviously never had 2 Kitkats fall out of a vending machine by mistake.SALARY NEGOTIATING TIPS FOR WOMEN: ask employer about their needs, apologize for existing, tell them you'll work a half day on your due dateMy body during ovulation vs. my body on day 1 of my periodStop tweeting about what real women are and are not. ?Damn boy, are you a bra?
women: well for start- !The third error? 50 Genuinely Funny Jokes to make you laugh Last Updated: 8th July 2020.
"Are you even a girl if you don't tell people you're wearing jeans and a nice top? Everyone loves witty jokes. If it were up to me, I’d take Heaven for the climate and Hell for the company. 31 Jokes That Will Make Women Laugh Way Harder Than They Should ... Because you make me uncomfortable but society has brainwashed me into thinking I need you.